Ssalongo, sex is not a KPI. Take it easy!

If you are not ready to deliver good sex, don't bother giving some. There shouldn't be a bad day for sex. Any time is tea time, but if the spices are not enough, have water instead.

Partners, especially women, have given all kinds of excuses not to have sex. From "it was a bad day at work" to "the babies are still awake in the next room, and they will hear us." No woman ever says, "not today, and I won't be able to deliver a good one."

A woman will even blame their boss at work for not being able to give some to their partner. They will never tell their man that they are too tired to have another human on top of them. They are too tired of everything else but the one true reason.

Partners deny their people sex because of very different reasons than the ones they give. A woman will deny you morning sex because your mouth smells like a sewer, but they are trying so hard to let you down politely.

They will deny you some because they are tired of the same missionary style, which seems to be your cumming style. You get on top of them, and all you care about is popping your nut and covering up next to them.

When was the last time you genuinely had a conversation with your wife or husband about your sex life? When was the last time you revised the sex styles? When was the last time you asked your woman if she has cum?

Women get genuinely tired. And so do men. But they can't be tired every day of the month. They are not tired every day of the week. If they are not giving you some, be worried.

If all they moan is, "please cum for me," it means that you are giving the worst kind of sex, and they just want to be done with it and get on with their lives.

Marriages have the worst sex because you have made sex a KPI. It has become a job. Conjugal rights, but at what cost?

When was the last time you looked at your partner's sex machine and appreciated every corner? When was the last time you looked at her body after she gave birth and told her that she was still your Angel?

Why do you wait for him to get hard and start asking about school fees and when he will fix the things he promised three years ago? What do you want him to do with the hard-on?

How do you expect a man to give you good sex when all you do is bring up the affair he had four years ago? If you decided to stay, you have to deliver the goods in a very good spirit.

He flirted with her or even gave her some. You found out by going through his phone, not that it is any of your business, by the way. You quarrelled, cursed, cried and decided to stay. When he taps your back, give him away and let the man enjoy his honey pot.

Denying him sex is not a punishment. It will only keep you up at night. Give your man with one heart. Switch off your mind for a few minutes and enjoy what he is giving you.

Sex has to be enjoyed. The moment it becomes a KPI, it becomes a do-or-die, and that is where things go wrong. You can get tired, but not for a month or even a week.

Change positions. Talk dirty. Flirt during the day. Encourage the flirting. Don't reply your man with a list of what to bring home in the evening when he sends you a text asking how hard you want it at night.

Let's just try out a few things we do on the side with our life partners and save that lodge money. Let's be open-minded and allow ourselves to enjoy sex.

Till next time, it is a marriage, not a war zone.