She fell in love even after she fought with all her might against it,
at the time she didn’t even love her self imagine her surprise that
she could love another that deeply, that her day, life depended on
him being in it, that she could do the unthinkable for him. That her
whole existence started to make sense when they met. She looked
forward to meeting him, blushed with every compliment. But was afraid,
afraid to lose herself in him.
They were very trying times in her life, the worst she had ever
experienced and he was all she had, all she needed was to talk to him
any and every time and she got that, all she needed was to know
everything about him and sadly she didn’t get that which kept her
wanting more and more, all she wanted was to be loved and she got
that, all she needed was to be capable of loving another and she
happily got that. but was it reciprocated she often wondered?
It wasn’t enough because she never settles for less she wanted it all
or nothing at all, all of it and all of him he loved her, yes but it
wasn’t enough if he didn’t give it all, she loved him but it wasn’t
enough since she was afraid of giving it all. She feared she loved
him too much and showing it would make him grow wings. They protected
their hearts from heartache but still felt the wrath of it, burning
coals that hurt so much they can never dare to go back. There are
loves that hurt well I guess all do but then there are loves that hurt
and hurt and as you seem to be recovering they hurt all over again you
get a glimpse of hell its self.
It was all on them though, they never gave it their all, they talked
daily but never about the real stuff, they loved but their egos got in
the way because they could have loved more, trusted but could have
done more, so much wasted time with few happy memories. But they can
never go back because no one deserves that much pain twice in one
lifetime. It was a pained love, hot and cold emotionally draining
wondering if you had done wrong, or not every damn time quarreling and
taking breaks. So much wasted time.
But it didn’t mean it was the end of the world, it didn’t even mean
you only fall in love once because now she is the happiest with her
new man. He gives her all that sometimes she wonders if it is real, only
for him to prove over and over that it is. It took quite some time but
she found love beyond measure. She learned that love is not difficult
it’s either there or it’s not, that men are not necessarily dogs, we
just meet ones that are not for us. When a man loves you he will treat
you right he will listen attentively.
There is love after a great love, do not give up just yet, yes you…
there is the hope of meeting a special one. One who will understand you,
cherish you, love you, be in love with you, he will trust you, she
will be faithful to you. It might take a while or it could just be
tomorrow.
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