Museveni, Moses Ali urge Biden to rest

General Moses Ali not happy with US President Joe Biden for repeatedly calling Adjumani 'Azumani'

President Biden looked into the camera and smiled wanly. He had just sunk his frame into a seat inside the Yellow Oval Room in the White House for a video conferencing with Uganda's Yoweri Museveni.

"Oh, Mr Joel Museveni, why would a tired old man choose an even more tired old man for his secretary to this meeting?" he said.

Museveni: Who? With me is General Moses Ali, a deputy prime minister and an important figure in securing the peace and stability of Uganda. Yoweri, please, not Joel.

Moses Ali: [Whispering] I think the sound is not good, did I just hear that old man call me an older secretary?

Biden: Your whispers are very audible, I can hear it all from America.

Ali: You called me an 'even older man' than my President yet it is you Americans are worried of...

Biden: No, you get the wrong narrative. Americans are not worried about me but you African leaders who cling to power. Like you, Moses, the briefing I'm getting is that you recently made some awkward attempts to dance or walk or do both to impress on Azumani people that you are still strong.

Ali: Adjumani, not Azumani. And I'm still very strong. Imagine I've been waiting for this meeting since nine hours ago and you have only just woken up like any other tired person.

Museveni: Shhh! Moses...

Ali: He called me old, let me tell him. Mr President Biden, if you keep waking up at 3pm like today, China will be ten miles ahead of the US by November election.

Biden: My Azumani general, there is something called time-zone. It's actually seven in the morning across the Atlantic from you.

Ali: Oh, time-zone, that means you must be jet-lagged. Now I get why you keep saying Azumani, Azumani, Azumani...

Museveni: Moses, the brake pads in your tongue are worn out. You need new ones.

Biden: No, let him talk. I expect him to fall asleep anytime from now so maybe he is trying to say everything before that happens.

Ali: Hmm! The videos I see of you wandering around and offering handshakes with  nonexistent persons...

Biden: Okay, I concede, you've so much energy, the people of Azumani are blessed to have you for another five years from 2026.

Ali: Exactly. But Democrats out there need salvation from a man who has failed to say Adjumani even once. You need to step aside for someone fresher otherwise Trump will win and invite Putin and Jong Un to his DC party.

Biden: Only the All Mighty can decide whether I step down or not.

Museveni: Mr President, you are lifting my lines. I'm the one who was chosen by God and whose stay in office only God can decide.

Biden: Therefore... I take it back. So here it is, in Kenya, President Ruto listens. He just made a difficult decision because the people demanded... you could do the same with that death penalty law for gays.

Museveni: Mr President, there were no Gen-Z protesting against the law here. Ugandans wanted that law, not me.

Biden: Must it only be the street language to force a leader to rethink?

Museveni: I reckon you're also waiting to see a street language in New York to understand that Dems want you to step aside.

Ali: Yes, he looks too tired but he won't listen.

Biden: Interesting how you guys have spent all this time trying to make Joe Biden look like a typical Africa leader who cannot leave until he is shoved to the ground.

Museveni: Looks like we Africans are about to sue you for illegal imitation of our political syndrome.

Biden: The difference is that I am still genuinely strong, we don't rig here and the people will decide.

Museveni: There you go again, lifting more lines from my rhetoric.

Ali: He's about to say 'in 1986, the US economy was...'

Biden: Mr Azumani prime minister, you're trolling your own president!