Before you blame that side-dish, look into yourself

Ever received the "leave my man alone" phone call? Like you are minding your business, and the next thing is, there is a voice on the other side telling you that the man you are laying belongs to her.

Those are the phone calls that come when you are expecting a call from an interview you went for, when you are waiting for food delivery from your favourite food point.

And wallahi, leave my man alone! If you are ever on the other side of that phone call, you deserve every abuse that you got.

You deserve every embarrassment that came your way when you decided to walk up to another woman to warn them off your husband or man.

And yes, I will take the backlash because you think I don’t know how much it hurts to know that your man is sleeping with another woman. I know. I know the pain.

But let's be very honest with ourselves as women. What hurts the most is not that he is dipping his pen in that ink.

Is it? It is how much he is spending on it. Read that again.

The first thing that comes to your mind when you think your man is doing someone on the side is not the sex styles they are exploring. It is not the saliva swapping. It is how much and what it could do for you and your kids.

It is the type of car you could have upgraded to. It is that dress. The how much is what hurts most before thinking about the other woman knowing his cum-face.

I will tell you this, being a whore is very expensive, especially if you have a lot to lose. You will need to invest in keeping that secret.

That said, do not ever make that phone call to the other woman. No matter how much you feel betrayed. Even if it is someone you know closely. Be it a friend or even your sister.

The other woman is not your problem.

Trust that there are women;

1) that don’t know you exist

2) that know that you exist but don’t care

3) that are very okay being the other woman.

So for whatever reason, they are not to blame. That man, if he surely is yours, is the one with the answers. And if there is a talk to be had, it has to be with him.

Don't ever call the other woman asking what she thinks she has that you don't. What sex styles she has been serving your man.

And some just hit the low and ask is she thinks she is the first or even the last. Sometimes we even know why he is stepping out. We know exactly what to do. So, fix you.

Fix your attitude, fix the way you talk to your man. Fix the way you welcome your man back home. Try looking back at why he fell in love with you.

Ask yourself this, would you still be in love with you after all this time? Did you change much because he put a ring on it and now feel that you own him?

Do you still look the same? And yes, I know about baby weight and the smell of breast milk, but I also know that these can be fixed. Men are all about peace of mind.

Are you his? Or all you do is demand, demand and demand. Is all you do ask about his whereabouts, and then when he shows up, you deny him sex as punishment for coming late?

Fix you! Yes, some men will cheat even when you go up the ceiling and fall on it, but do your part. And when everything falls apart, know that you did your very best.

And before you forward this link to your woman, please know that next week, I will be here to tell you that she is cheating right back.

And why, of course. So till next time, fix yourself before you make that embarrassing phone call.