Happy New Year, lovers.
As you set new resolutions for 2021, do not forget to set new ones for the bedroom. Much as we put sex in the minors, it should be up there with the majors.
A person whose sex life is lit, is a better boss and an amazing co-worker. Most of the people who are sexually starved are the reason why you keep losing people at work.
That said, it is about time you came up with a ‘sex bucket list’ for 2021. Breathe life into your sex-life. This bucket-list should include anything you are interested in trying at some point before you die from a threesome, shower sex, to doing every position in the Kuma Sutra.
This year, make your partner(s) feel special about themselves. If you don’t like their body, instead of body shaming them, walk away.
Make a point not to be mean towards your lover because you are getting crazy sex on the side. Do not guilt trip, anyone, because of the dirty things you are doing. Instead of making her feel inferior, walk away, and let her find someone to give her some sexual healing.
I once visited someone who insists phones do not enter the bedroom. He was a bigshot, so at first, I thought he didn’t want any pictures or anything recorded. I hate not knowing. So, I asked.
He explained that technology has a serious impact on relationships and that if he is inviting me to the bedroom, I should know that we are getting naked and entering a time for phone-free hangout.
Put this among your sex resolutions this year. No more phones in the bedroom even if you are the President of the US. The “I work in the media, and anything can happen” reason should stay in 2020. Go in, have a non-distracted sex therapy, and then go break your story a happy person.
This year, break the freaking routine. Most couples have their own methods for getting in the mood. He knows to suck on your nipples first, get down to the belly, rub some place for a minute, and then go in for the action.
This definitely gets boring. Do not be surprised when she gets a gym instructor on the side. Break the routine and if they ask where you learnt it from, tell them 2020 was a nasty year, and you need to get a new normal.
For the first time in your life, ask your partner what they like. Yes, it seems simple, but so many people in regular sexual partnerships get this wrong.
Ask your partner what they like. Do they actually love that nipple bite, or are you guessing that the moan means continue? What turns them on? Sometimes a woman being wet doesn’t necessarily mean she has been turned on. Story for another day.
There is nothing sexier than sex talk. Get to learn your lover’s body. By the time they are done with all the things that turn them on, you would have moved from the usual one round to about 4.
Communication creates a deeper bond making the sex even more intense. And while at it, discuss sexual boundaries. Some of you are just doing things to please the other person and are being done in all the wrong places.
Talk that rubbish out. Thank me later.
If you had taken a break, and are just working things out sexually, make time to just be together first. Talk about any difficult feelings you have.
This is hard for some Ugandans, but after 2020, I expect us to be better human beings and make time to practice non-sexual contact such as touching, massage, and just being close.
Give your sex pad a bit of a makeover. Make space in the bedroom. Get rid of the clutter. Some of you take ages without opening those windows. That is disgusting.
This year, invest in some nice new bed linen. Thread count and all the boujee things you can think about. Sex is life. Transform your sex pad into a more attractive environment and make it more sex-ready,
If the bedroom is your preferred place for sex; which is true for most of you, try different lighting, add scent to it, get some massage oil next to your make-up kit. By all means, make it as inviting as possible after all, we are in the new normal.
In this 2021, be close to each other. Be naked, skin-to-skin. Give it a timeline, if you will. Just lie-in. And this isn’t just about sex, but being close to each other.
There can be so many barriers to intimacy: busy daily lives, different bedtimes, the book you are reading, your phone, pajamas etc. Use some naked time together just chatting, maybe holding hands or stroking each other.
It is 2021. We must enjoy sex after the year that shall not be mentioned.
Till next time, Miss D wishes you an erotic 2021!