Stranger things have happened in this country.
Those who have been following the news, know that a mega currency scandal is unfolding at Bank of Uganda.
At the heart of the scandal is money, said to be in billions of shillings, that reportedly found its way into the country but somehow did not make it to the central bank coffers.
The suspicion so far is that this money is hidden somewhere, in the houses of some of the eight central bank officials that have been apprehended so far.
Security agencies of every colour and texture have gone into overdrive as they try to recover the money and so far, they have made some progress.
According to sources that have spoken to The Rogue, the search for the money has already generated dramatic scenes.
Already, three security officers have been arrested after they fought over a mattress cover that from a distance appeared to be made of Shs 50,000 notes at one of the residences of a bank official.
Sources told us that from a distance, you could think the notes on the mattress are legit but on closer inspection, it was discovered that the 50K notes were just decorative.
“Alo, when you look at the mattress cover fooled all of us. We thought that we had discovered the money but when we inspected it, we discovered that the notes had been neatly stitched together by an expert,” one of my sources told me.
We have been told that the officer who discovered the mattress in the main bedroom at first did not know what to do.
He was overwhelmed because he had never seen anything like that, sources said.
He then called out to one of his colleagues and alerted him to his discovery.
“Shhhh…Keep quiet,” the one who had made the discovery said as his colleague shouted in excitement.
With their faces brimming and eyes wide open, the officers concurred that the money on the mattress was stitched by special glue and could be part of the money that was sneaked into the country.
They closed the door of the bedroom.
Then an evil thought crossed their minds.
“Why don’t we share some of this money and we declare less? We have so many problems. Yesterday I ate Kikomando for supper because I could not afford to buy banana fingers for Shs1000,” the one who made the discovery said.
His colleague joined in: “I have not paid school fees for two terms and yet these people earn so much money that it has become useless to them. They even stitch it on their mattresses?”
So they decided to find ways of detaching the notes from the mattress cover but discovered that it would be a difficult task.
After 30 minutes, there was a knock on the door from a senior investigator.
“Why have you locked yourselves in the bedroom?” he asked. “Open”.
When they opened the door, the investigator was shocked to discover that his juniors were busy trying to dismantle a mattress.
He moved closer but one of the officers told him to back off and sat the mattress cover.
“Back off from what?” the senior investigator shot back.
He then tried to push one of the officers away to get a closer look at the mattress cover.
But the officer instead punched him and a fight broke out.
“You senior afandes don’t want some of us, juniors to eat,” the junior officer said.
Before long other officers intervened.
The mattress cover, which was the cause of the fight, was then closely examined and it was discovered that the 50K notes on it were decorative and not genuine.
The three officers were handcuffed and checked into a detention centre.
Meanwhile the investigation into the currency scandal is still ongoing.
The Rogue is a satirical column that runs once a week on The Nile Post.
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