The house or Falament is flush with money, mischief and more. Let’s see what they are up to this week:
Speaker: Honorable gentlemen and ladies, I need to step out for a minute. My boda has just called me to say that he has delivered my new kiteteyi. I will be back in a few minutes. The rest of you, i.e. the dishonourable ones, I know you. Do not. I repeat, do not give yourselves any new allowances while I am gone. Especially you, member from Kilama.
Kilama: I don’t fear her. After all we can get a new Speaker. I hear there is a new party that was launched. We will get a speaker from there.
Member from Ssebunyampa: Eh. But these kids can dance. Every day there is a new party. Back to school party. Beach party. Reggae party. Full moon party. Half moon party. No Moon Party…
Member From Pimkwam: I know. I move to increase allowances yet again because I am a prolific blesser. Three in each University. I have many tickets to buy.
Member From Mbocwa: The speaker clearly said. Ouch!
Member From Alipepe: That is not what she said.
Member From Mbocwa: No, I said Ouch because that thug threw a shoe at me.
Member From Pimkwam: And if you don’t shut up I will throw another one and then vote allowances for increased footwear budget. Don’t joke with me. In Pimkwam we are famous for our aim.
Member from Ddriput: He’s right. My constituency is next to his. Their shots are lethal. Not only when it comes to mango trees and edible rat, but half the unwanted pregnancies in my constituency can be traced to Pimkwam boys.
Youth Member of Alipepe: Who is the deejay at this new party? For me that is what matters.
Member From Mbocwa: Not that kind of party, you shabby rascal. It is a political party. From Mugisha Muntu. It’s called ANT.
Woman member from Alipepe: Political party? People still waste time with those?
I’m bored. Let’s make a back to school party. Here in chambres everyone comes wearing school uniform of the school you attended
What about The Member From Gonja municipality? We all know her problem.
Oh. Or the school your forged certificates for.
You guys I attended school. Ask me 12 times four!
Then why did you forge papers?
Duh. Cos I dropped out
Guys this party is serious. Mugisha Muntu has launched a new party…
Member From Ssebunyampa: Guys, what was Amama Mbabazi’s party last time?
Youth Member from Alipepe: Who remembers. Wasn’t it also an insect? Cockroach? Flea? Bedbug? These opposition guys are just like insects to us ruling party anyway.
Member from Ggwa South: Madam Speaker sir, is it in order for the member to … where is the speaker you guys?
Member From Ggwa North: Speaking as a member of the ruling party, is it in order for this child to come here with his skinny jeans saying parties are useless? Who immunised you? I move that the youth member be found in contempt and sentenced to the naughty corner.
Youth Member from Alipepe: Ruling party biki. What have you done since you ruled!
Member from Ggwa North: We brought democracy
Youth Member from Alipepe: How has democracy helped me?
Member from Alipepe: You voted new allowances just last week! Look at you.
Youth Member From Alipepe: Oh yes. Ruling party oyee. So where do we get complimentary tickets for his new party?