The only reason you should take back that ex

Love Therapist

Many will say an ex is an ex for a reason don't go back there, others will swear looking at him now I don’t even know what I was thinking, I think I was just blinded by the good sex  and many good reasons, she is too shallow don't know I survived this long with her.

Nevertheless moving on from someone you have been with for some good time is not a walk in the park, Whether you ended the relationship or they did. The good thing though is, sometimes the reasons your ex is an ex are entirely fixable.

Many times, a breakup can trigger something inside of you that makes you instantly realise that parting with your ex was a huge mistake, maybe you broke up with them over something petty, or perhaps it was just bad timing when the two of you started your relationship.

Let’s look at what may hold your gag reflex over an ex.

Your ex is the best you ever had, if it has been years since the relationship ended, and you’re still miserable without your ex, it may be a sign that the two of you should get back together get over your pride and do something about it.

After an extended amount of time apart, the two of you probably realise that being together is what made you feel truly content, and no matter what you do, the two of you just can’t seem to shake each other. If this sounds like your situation, you should definitely consider reconciling with your ex.

They just may be the missing piece that really completes you. Sometimes it takes breaking up for you to realise that your ex was the best thing that has ever happened to you. You've done a lot of dating since the two of you broke up, and no one else compares, not even close. They’re just not funny enough, you don’t click with them, they don't smile with their eyes and you just don’t feel that same spark you felt with your ex.

When it comes to being the complete package, your ex was all that and then some, but you didn't realise it until it was too late. If you really feel deep down in your heart of hearts that your ex is the best lover, partner, companion and friend you've ever had, then getting back together is definitely an option that you should take into consideration. Give them a call, if they are still miserable without you...

When they finally beat that addiction and it’s the only reason you broke up, could have been over drinking,  excessive outings (you met in a club and every time you complain they remind you of that), was doing drugs, compulsive stealing also known as Kleptomania, Internet addiction in a nut shell porn, video games addiction which always made you feel like you are the side dish, control issues and excessive jealousy, excessive laziness that you couldn't even find a job or a lady that’s sleeps in until midday- no chores done, a very disorganised house.

These addictions start with them admitting they are addicted and then seeking help, if they do this then you just might have that happily ever after.

If they finally stand up to their parents, there is nothing more frustrating than a mama’s boy who always has to ask and take the mothers advice all the time. "My mama said this and I trust her opinion I mean that woman raised me, she carried me for 9 months the least I can do is do what she says".

A man child always running back to mummy and its worse if they are rich, that dad's girl will always run to dad crying Henry did this dad, can you imagine and you will get an earful from the dad. Rich parents tend to be more intrusive especially if they are still helping out financially this is intensified if the spouse lets them in on everything happening in the relationship.

When their parents complain and make you feel lacking in what they need as a boyfriend/girlfriend for their child and they do not step up for you these are grounds for break up. If you broke up because of this and your ex finally realises that they love you more than their dependence on their family, if they realise they have to grow up and live an independent life from them that’s a good enough reason to take them back.

Only if they had a near death situation, life changing moment and they are now mature enough to value everything they have in their lives. People don't change and not to sound sexist men do not change unless something out of the normal has happened and the worst part about this is, when a woman decides to stay and not break off the relationship because of this, she spends the rest of her life trying to change the man.

But if you decide to break off the relationship because he doesn't value you enough to change or she just can’t stop trying to change you and you want her to love you the way you are and your ex latter changes it’s a great reason to have them back.

The timing was off, one of you needed to grow, or you needed a new perspective on the relationship, if you had to go away for a job and you both didn't find someone else. Sometimes you need to mature a little more before you’re able to give the relationship a shot, or perhaps you need to be more settled in your career before you’re able to really be the best spouse.

Often time’s couples break up and get back together years later when the timing is perfect. The relationship is able to last because the two of them are at the right points in their lives to put their all into the relationship.

They are now willing to settle, if you needed them to step up, perhaps you thought the relationship would lead to marriage, but your ex wasn't ready, or maybe you were ready to have kids, but your ex decided they didn't want to have children. But after breaking up, maybe they have changed their viewpoint on love and the relationship.

Now is the time for you and your ex to sit down and have an open and honest conversation on what your expectations are, and what kind of relationship you’re looking for and if you are now both on the right page,  growing old together maybe achievable.

When you realise you love them despite their many weaknesses, that their small shortcomings are nothing compared to the love you feel for them or the happiness they give you. When you realise you actually are insanely in love with them, sometimes we need some time off to realise what is truly important, we don't know what we have until we lose it.

For him to truly appreciate Kate, William had to first  call things off to realise she is the woman he couldn't live without , a few years later the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are still happily married. If your time apart made you realise this, going back to your ex wouldn't be abominable.

Research shows  most on and off relationships do not last and some exes only come back  because they are lonely, miss sex , jealous of your new relationship, co-dependency among many. That said trade carefully, you broke up for a reason and unless the reason has been dealt with or is fixable, do not go back to that ex.

#throughmyeyes

 

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