While other countries struggle to take the first human to Mars, to find cures to cancer and to stop the Kardashians Uganda’s hottest topic at the time of writing is the presidential age limit.
In four years’ time, the country’s president, it is suspected, will cross overrnto the wrong side
of 75 years, making him ineligible to stand for the only job our teachers toldrnus to study hard to get.
However,rnhe’s not letting it go in peace.
Through Ichuli-like level of cunning,rnhe has already handed brown envelopes to the broke men of God to edit him intornchurch records, hence chop his
age…and like the biblical camel squeezing through a needle’s eye, he hasrninserted himself into the 2021 presidential elections debate.
Trick 2, as per his “How to rule Uganda For Life”-manual, is to stirrnup up-country citizens to march on the streets and support the removal of thernage limit.
The latestrnarea to be hit by this nodding disease is Kabale. I found no other name for arn”disease” where people nod to whatever they are told after beingrnhanded heavy brown envelopes.
A district located in the extreme ends of where probably God rests his toe hairs, rnladen with subsistence farming and heavily dependent on Irish potatoes isrnfull of people who want to kill for the age limit to be lifted.
Seriously?!rnIn their stomachs, they fill Irish potatoes and couple of roads plus widernspread illiteracy and mediocre health centres…should they be the major fuel tornpush their resolutions.
Have they seen better? NO. I’m sure Kabale people only come to Kampala to visitrnrelatives, become maids or to buy rubber sandals aka nigiina.
What else dornthey know? PROBABLY they think life starts, goes on and ends with Irishrnpotatoes, sorry to say.
Led by Edison Turyanawe, the NRM publicity secretary for Kabale, they marchedrnthrough the town centre, thirsty, hungry and gasping for air in the hot
afternoon heat, mbu fighting for the rights of a man whose stand outrncontribution to them was probably the “Another Rap”-hit banger.
The same man was probably in a Jacuuzi somewherernin the State House basement, picking cherries out of baskets held by sixrnvirgins, sipping wine and probably
enjoying the EPL transfer deadline day on a 70 inch TV.
However, they claim to be innocent in all this. Some said the people on thernstreets supporting the age limit removal aren’t residents of Kabale and thatrnthey were ferried by Sevo using his m.. I mean taxpayers’ money.
Those who follow politricks know this isn’t far off. We saw it in 2016.
Ferrying broke insane natives to hype numbers and be rewarded with a plate ofrnUgali and weevil infested beans is not unheard of in Uganda.
The real housewives(read natives) of Kabale distanced themselves fromrnthis nonsense, but didn’t ask about the origins of those lunatics that tookrnover their streets.
The marches continue though. Whether the participants are ferried or are realrnnatives, we won’t know for now. But after Lira and Kabale, we expect the noddingrndisease/ brown envelope fever, characterized by signs like “chronicrnscreaming of “remove age limits”-, to go viral.
My only advice is: don’t accept to be ferried around the country screaming things you don’t understand for a plate of posho. Come at my place and we joke about it. Food will be free.